✎ Fel's Creative Journal (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
tinfoiltennis) wrote2011-06-26 08:17 pm
tinfoiltennis) wrote2011-06-26 08:17 pm
☇ multimedia - superwho - episode two
Title: SuperWho: Episode Two
Fandom: Superwho (Doctor Who/Supernatural)
Characters: The Tenth Doctor, Donna Noble, Dean Winchester, Bobby Singer, Sam Winchester, Castiel
Pairing?: None (as of yet)
Rating: PG-13
Summary: SuperWho episode two: with the souls inside Castiel able to go into meltdown at any moment, the Doctor and Donna seek out the help of Bobby and the Winchesters in making a ritual from scratch to save him.
Notes: SUPERWHO BANDWAGON AHOY. Second episode of the Superwho series I'm serialising on my tumblr. That site isn't good for some people's internet connections, so I'm also posting them here as I finish each episode. :'D Imagine each image+dialogue combo as part of a scene in an episode, and you're golden.
Warnings: BE WARNED FIRST OF ALL THAT THIS IS AN IMAGE-HEAVY POST, NOT DIAL-UP FRIENDLY. Other than that, spoilers for the end of season 6 of Supernatural; questionable blending of the physics and mythologies of the two series together; unashamed fix-it for the s6 finale; shamelessly self-indulgent writing.
✎ ✎ ✎
DONNA: But what do you mean, meltdown, I mean you can't actually mean--
DOCTOR: I can. Think of the souls as - actually don't think of them as souls at all, think of them as energy, masses and masses of it, and imagine all the power that comes with that.
DONNA: Enough power to turn someone into a god, right?
DOCTOR: Yes, but it's more than that, people, any people, aren't made to contain so much artificially gained energy, not anything that doesn't come naturally. If anyone tried they'd burn up within the first day.
DONNA: But Cas is still here.
DOCTOR: Yes but he's not human, he's an angel, and that's literally the only reason he hasn't yet. Angels are from a bubble universe attached to the side of this one, you'd call it Heaven, they're made of stronger stuff than that. Hence why Cas became a sort of god, he lasted long enough to actually make use of all that power. The thing is, once you've got power like that it's difficult to let it go.
DONNA: Speaking from experience?
DOCTOR: Not mine. A friend's... But power like that, it changes you, it takes whatever was in your head at the moment you took it in and amplifies it. The thing is, fifty million souls, nothing in the universe could sustain that much energy within themselves for an unlimited amount of time, let alone energy that was sentient itself, sooner or later they'd die! Well, maybe the Eternals could do it, but they're not even of this universe half the time...
DONNA: Hang on, so that's it, he's gonna die?
DOCTOR: I wish it was just that. Fifty million souls plus an angel's Grace, that's one big nuclear bomb ready to go off, and when it does that's half the planet gone. If we're lucky.
DONNA: How long have we got?
DOCTOR: I dunno. Days, weeks, months, maybe, it's impossible to tell.
DONNA: Well we're gonna do something about it, right?
DOCTOR: Oh, Donna Noble, it's like you don't even know me. Come on! We've got an angel to defuse and we can't do that if we stand around here all day.
✎ ✎ ✎
DOCTOR: Castiel! There you are, I was worried you’d flown off somewhere. Listen, this is important, and I’m sorry, but I’ve got some bad news.
CASTIEL: What about?
DOCTOR: About you. Those souls, they’re not just giving you power, they’re ripping you apart, or they will do. I know you don’t want to, but you have to let them go.
CASTIEL: I can’t.
DOCTOR: Oh for heaven’s sake, come on, Cas, this isn’t the time to be proud—
CASTIEL: You misunderstand me. I can’t.
DOCTOR: Can’t-can’t, or…? D’you mind if I…?
CASTIEL: I imagine you will regardless of whether I say yes or no.
DOCTOR: Pretty much, yeah. [He crouches down a little, staring into CASTIEL’s eyes]
DONNA: What are you doing, reading his mind?
DOCTOR: Sort of, now shhh, I’m concentrating. Oh, I was afraid of that.
DONNA: What now?
DOCTOR: He’s right, he can’t get rid of them. I mean, literally, physically can’t, it’s not a matter of will or won’t anymore. [To CASTIEL:] How long have you known about this?
CASTIEL: Long enough. It didn’t seem to be so much of a problem until recently.
DONNA: Not a problem? You’re being torn apart, how can that not seem to be a problem?
DOCTOR: Because until recently, I doubt he even realised that. Well, fifty million souls cushioning you from yourself, worming their way in there, anyone could overlook it until it was too late.
CASTIEL: Doctor, I’m not blind. I went into this knowing the risks.
DOCTOR: And thought you’d dodged a bullet until the high wore off, hm?
CASTIEL: If you want to put it that way, then yes.
DONNA: Look, this is all fantastic talking, but what are we going to do? I mean, no offence, but you could go off at any minute!
DOCTOR: Yeah, still working on that, thanks Donna. I’ll tell you what we’re not gonna do though. We’re not gonna let half of this planet get nuked, and I am not going to let you die. Not on my watch.
✎ ✎ ✎
CASTIEL: Where did you send Donna?
DOCTOR: The TARDIS library. The one near the swimming pool, not the one next to the observatory, I’ve got a few books in there that might come in handy. I might be good, but something like this is gonna take research. Research and a bit of help.
CASTIEL: Help from where?
DOCTOR: Bobby Singer and his library, that’s where.
CASTIEL: … I see. I don’t think I - perhaps it’s best that I shouldn’t come. [The DOCTOR gives him a quizzical look.] We didn’t exactly part on the best of terms.
DOCTOR: You’re all gonna have to stop dancing around each other sooner or later, you know. What with everything that’s happening I’d prefer if it was sooner. [CASTIEL doesn’t answer; the DOCTOR’s expression softens.] Oh, alright. I’ll go in there and force them to listen, shall I? Probably have more luck that way, they’d have to duct tape my mouth shut to stop me talking.
CASTIEL: Sometimes I doubt that even that would have much of an effect.
DOCTOR: Did you just— you did! You made a joke in English! [He shakes his head in wonder, grinning a bit, before glancing towards the corridor leading out of the control room.] Where’s Donna got to? It doesn’t take that long to get to the library, I’m sure I told her the short cut…
CASTIEL: Doctor.
DOCTOR: Hmm?
CASTIEL: Can I tell you something if you promise not to tell another soul?
DOCTOR: Always.
CASTIEL: … I’m. Afraid. More than I’d like to admit.
DOCTOR: Oh, you — come here, you.
CASTIEL: What are you— [CASTIEL’s words are cut off as the DOCTOR pulls him into a hug.]
DOCTOR: I’m giving you a hug, you daft old thing. One that’s probably way overdue.
✎ ✎ ✎
[The TARDIS materialises in the corner of BOBBY’s library; DEAN and SAM stand up in alarm while BOBBY rushes in from the next room. The DOCTOR and DONNA step out.]
DOCTOR: Right, so! I’ve got good news and bad news—
BOBBY: And d’ya mind not usin’ my house as a parkin’ lot?
DOCTOR: [Looks at him with wide eyes, as if it never occurred to him] Um. Right, sorry about that. But anyway, like I was saying I’ve got good news and bad news, which do you want first?
DEAN: Did you find him?
DOCTOR: As a matter of fact I did, yeah.
DEAN: And?
DOCTOR: And he’s not as far gone mentally as you lot made him out to be, which is the good news. Whatever the souls did to his mind, it’s there, but it’s worn off a bit since that first night.
SAM: What’s the bad news?
DOCTOR: The bad news is that you were right, he’s full of nukes and he could explode at any minute, are you happy?
DEAN: Dammit, I told him this was a bad idea! Where is he?
DONNA: He’s not coming, sorry. And to be honest with you, pretty boy, I don’t blame him.
DEAN: And just what the hell’s that supposed to mean?
DONNA: Are you having a laugh?
DEAN: I’m not the one who worked with a demon to pop open frigging Purgatory—
DONNA: Which I’d bet a million quid mightn’t have happened if someone had actually been with him all that time he was fighting, instead of—
DEAN: Listen here, sweetheart, you don’t know the first—
DONNA: Oi! Don’t you call me sweetheart and interrupt me—
DOCTOR: Both of you, shut up! Now listen, we can call each other names and point fingers at each other about who did what as much as you like later on, but right now, I’d quite like to save my friend, alright?
[Shocked silence.]
DOCTOR: Right, thank you. Sam, get on your laptop, I’ve got a list of things for you to research, Dean, Donna, you two hit the books, I’ve got a pile I brought with me from the TARDIS, start with those and see if there’s anything in Bobby’s collection which’ll be useful. Bobby, you’re with me.
BOBBY: Doin’ what, exactly?
DOCTOR: Brainstorming, if we’re gonna figure out a way to get this much power out of Castiel safely then we need to work together.
DONNA: You heard the Spaceman, now let’s get a move on!
✎ ✎ ✎
[DEAN and DONNA are poring over some books in mixed concentration, frustration, and boredom.]
DEAN: What does he even want us to look for anyway?
DONNA: I dunno, something useful I guess. The thing about the Doctor’s plans is that he usually makes them up as he goes along, it’s how he works best.
DEAN: Great. Just great.
DONNA: There’s no need to be like that. Look, I know you don’t know him, but I do, and he’ll figure this one out. He always does.
DEAN: This is a pretty big one to figure out.
DONNA: He saves a planet every other day.
DEAN: … touche.
DONNA: Dean, can I talk to you about something?
DEAN: If it’s about Cas, then no.
DONNA: Brilliant, all the more reason for me to ask.
DEAN: Donna, I can’t, alright?
DONNA: Bollocks, of course you can. Not talking’s part of what got you into this mess, isn’t it? So talk to me, just this once. It’s not gonna kill you.
DEAN: I wouldn’t even know where to start.
DONNA: Okay then, let me start for you. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve talked to Castiel myself, and I think he’s a bit of a stubborn idiot. But see, he was fighting that war all that time all by himself, you must’ve known he was gonna have to get up to some shady stuff if no one told him otherwise. I mean, didn’t you ever ask, not even once? Or, I dunno, think to let him know you were worried about him?
DEAN: I told him he was family.
DONNA: You told him he used to be. And I’ve seen what the Spaceman can be like if he’s left on his own. You see, the thing is, people like the Doctor, and that angel of yours, they’re brilliant and they make you see things like no one else has before and you love them to bits… but they need people like us to stop them. To take care of them.
DEAN: You think I don’t know that? How the hell d’you think we got into this mess?
DONNA: Don’t give me that. If you knew all that, why didn’t you help him? All you did was wait till it was too late before giving him the boot! [She sighs.] Look, I know we’ve been getting at each other’s throats since the Doctor got us here, and I’m not saying I know everything about you two, but promise me something. Try and patch things up if you can, yeah? Take it from someone who’s seen it, people are a lot more dangerous when they’re like that.
DEAN: Like what?
DONNA: Lonely.
✎ ✎ ✎
DONNA: Oi, Spaceman! Have you got a minute?
DOCTOR: [Looking up from the book he’s poring over with BOBBY, eyes wide behind his glasses:] Yeah, what for?
DONNA: I was thinking right, you said this isn’t the first time you’ve seen something like this happen, and it happened to one of your friends, right? So what I was thinking was, can’t we just do what you did last time to get rid of all that energy?
DOCTOR: Well, the thing is it’s not quite as simple as just getting rid of the energy, not with as much of it as we’re dealing with, and especially since that energy’s souls. Something this big needs the energy to go from one place to the other, an energy transfer.
DONNA: Right, so how did you do that last time?
DOCTOR: Well, last time I used myself as part of the energy transfer.
DONNA: And…?
DOCTOR: And well, I — do we really have to talk about this?
DONNA: Well it’s not as if it’s anything embarrassing, is it? … Is it, though?
DOCTOR: Well - no, not embarrassing, it’s just that - well, last time it happened, with my friend, I kissed her to get the energy out. [Defensively, at everyone’s looks:] It was a simple energy transfer, alright, I didn’t have much time to come up with anything else!
DEAN: Wait wait wait, so now your plan’s to kiss him?
DONNA: Well, if you don’t want the Spaceman snogging him, pretty boy, you could always do it. [At DEAN’S glare:] I’m just saying!
DOCTOR: Right, anyway! No, actually, that’s not the plan, ‘cause it wouldn’t work in this case as it is. The only reason it worked last time was because it was energy from the time vortex, literally the stuff that time is made of. I’m a Time Lord so I have a sort of affinity for it, like attracts like, but even then it forced me to regenerate.
SAM: Regenerate?
DOCTOR: Time Lord trick, sort of a way to cheat death. My entire body changes instead of dying. Keeps me looking young. [He grins cheekily.]
SAM: [Disbelievingly, with a sort of huffed laugh:] Wow.
DONNA: Okay, so snogging him’s out as a plan unless anyone fancies some of that, so what are we doing instead?
DOCTOR: Going native.
BOBBY: Meanin’?
DOCTOR: Meaning a ritual. Not any we can find in a book, we’re gonna have to cobble together our own from scratch using other ones as a guide. I mean, no one’s ever swallowed all the souls from Purgatory before, no one would have even thought of it, so it’s not as if there’s a precedent for us to find a quick fix for.
BOBBY: You’re sayin’ we make up our own ritual. Us? Right now?
DOCTOR: Yeah.
DEAN: Will it fix him?
DOCTOR: If we do it right. Which we will, if you lot get back on those books and find me anything which might come in handy for it. Stuff about energy transfer, souls, separating out things that have become tangled up, anything which seems even vaguely related, bookmark it. We can’t afford to leave anything to chance.
✎ ✎ ✎
BOBBY: Y’know, if we pull this thing off it’s gonna be the most patchwork ritual I’ve ever worked. We musta pulled stuff from every source I know for this thing. And then a few that I don’t. I ain’t heard of a carrionite or an eternal before.
DOCTOR: The Carrionites knew a thing or two about spellmaking and words. You lot solve problems with numbers, they built a society - well, for a given value of what you’d call a society - based on using words in the right order and shape, they could do anything with that. Human spellmaking’s based on it, or well, the stuff you don’t get from demons or angels is.
SAM: And the Eternals?
DOCTOR: You’d think of them as gods. Or concepts, some of them. Powerful beings, like Death, for example, they don’t even exist inside this universe half the time. After the Time War most of them fled, but I’ve run into them on occasion, picked up a few things that’d come in handy.
SAM: I gotta say, trying to pull all of this together is making my head spin.
BOBBY: Well of course it is! We’re writin’ up a ritual from scratch, boy, you thought it was goin’ to be easy? What with the list of ingredients we’ve narrowed down alone I’m gonna need to restock after all this.
DEAN: So what are we doing this crazy alien ritual of yours in anyway, I mean, Latin? Enochian?
DOCTOR: Neither, actually. No offence, but no language on Earth is precise enough for something like this, and we need precision more than anything else. Enochian’s not much better, I mean, it’s all very well and good for angelic rituals, but this needs a little something more.
DEAN: A little something like what?
DOCTOR: My language. From Gallifrey, my home planet.
DONNA: You’re gonna use your language? Seriously, though? I don’t think I’ve ever really seen it, except for on your post-it notes and the TARDIS computer. I don’t think I’ve ever even heard you speak it before.
DOCTOR: Well. It’s not like there’s anyone to speak it to…
SAM: But - your language? That’s amazing, I mean, a language spoken by a species that can time travel must have—
DOCTOR: At least twenty different tenses more than human languages, yeah. You lot have never had to deal with what happens when personal timelines overlap or don’t match up, or when things are in the same place but in different dimensions. Honestly I’ve always wondered how you coped…
SAM: Can I see it? Or - I dunno, could you speak some for us?
DONNA: Oh, come on, he’s a person, not a science exhibit!
DOCTOR: No, Donna, it’s okay, I’m gonna have to speak it later on anyway, I might as well warm up. Pass me a bit of paper and a pen, Sam, and in the meantime — [The DOCTOR pauses, almost in trepidation, takes a breath - and when he next speaks, it’s in Gallifreyan; a rolling, flowing language full of vowels that’s more like a song than talking. In the DOCTOR’s voice, it sounds almost like excitable birdsong made more human.]
DONNA: … that was your language?
DOCTOR: Yeah.
DONNA: It’s beautiful. [She smiles at the DOCTOR; he gives her a small one back.]
DEAN: What did you just say?
DOCTOR: Roughly translated into English, I just told you that the next time I will have seen you will be the second time you’ll meet me, but it was the fifth time I met you in a place that won’t have not existed. [He frowns while everyone else stares at him blankly, and returns to his piece of paper.] I think I might have screwed up a tense or two there, it all gets a bit muddy in translation…
BOBBY: Don’t worry, we get it, your language is better for this than ours.
DEAN: Why are you drawing all those circles?
DONNA: That’s what it looks like written down, you idiot.
DEAN: You’re gonna do this ritual with a bunch of circles. Really?
SAM: Dude, seriously, knock it off, that’s his language you’re insulting.
BOBBY: If it gets the job done he can use double Dutch for all I care. Now will one of you idjits get over here and help me figure out how to string this thing together while he figures out which of those “circles” we’re usin’, or am I the one doin’ all the hard work here?
✎ ✎ ✎
[DONNA has excused herself and slipped away for a little bit, walking some way down the road from BOBBY’s salvage yard until she’s a good distance away from anything else. Once she reaches what she thinks is a good distance away, she glances upwards and lets out a breath.]
DONNA: Um… Castiel? Blimey, I feel like an idiot doing this… um, it’s Donna. I was just wondering if you wanted to talk or something, I dunno. It’s just me, in case you’re wondering. No one else is here, I just popped out ‘cause—
CASTIEL: Hello, Donna.
DONNA:[Turning with a slight shriek] Blimey! Give a girl some warning next time, would you? Popping out of nowhere like that, you’ll end up giving someone a heart attack!
CASTIEL: Apologies. What did you want?
DONNA: I just wanted to see how you were holding up, I guess. Thought you might want some company or something.
CASTIEL: That’s… thoughtful, but unnecessary.
DONNA: Sure it is. The Doctor’s working everyone hard, in case you wanted to know. Got us putting together a ritual from scratch and everything.
CASTIEL: He’s creating his own?
DONNA: Of course he is, you know he doesn’t like to do anything by halves. I dunno, I just thought maybe you’d want an update, seeing as how it’s all about you. What about you, though. I mean, what have you been doing?
CASTIEL: For good or ill, it seems as though I won’t have this power for much longer. I’m making use of it while I can.
DONNA: Right, something tells me I’d be better off not asking about that. You know, it’s funny. With all the things I’ve seen, travelling with the Doctor, I never thought this’d be one of the things I’d end up doing.
CASTIEL: What?
DONNA: Well, talking to an angel, a god even, I mean - aliens is one thing, but this is mental! Gramps has never been the praying type, he wouldn’t even go to church half the time, but my old dad used to make me say my prayers every night, all proper and everything. I dunno, I think after I got older, I started thinking maybe no one was really listening. No offence.
CASTIEL: There’s always someone listening. There’s just not always an answer.
DONNA: Same thing in the end, isn’t it.
CASTIEL: … Perhaps.
DONNA: Lord, just listen to the two of us. I’m giving Betty from down the street a run for her money with all this talk. [She sighs.] It’s gonna be alright, though, you know that, right?
CASTIEL: You seem so sure of that.
DONNA: Well. After being with the Spaceman for long enough, you start thinking nothing’s impossible anymore, really. Just a bit unlikely, that’s what he says. I just thought you needed to hear someone else say it.
✎ ✎ ✎
DONNA: How are we doing?
DOCTOR: Oh, there you are! Where did you wander off to?
DONNA: I just went for a walk to clear my head, calm down. How have things been back here?
BOBBY: Well, we think we’ve got most of what we need down. Just need to run over it a couple more times, check we haven’t missed anything vital or put somethin’ in where it don’t need to be.
SAM: We’ve already been checking over it as we go, but better safe than sorry.
DOCTOR: Well, there’s at least one more thing we need. Something very important, actually, and I need to get permission for it now.
DONNA: Okay, what is it?
DOCTOR: Blood.
DONNA: Blood?
DOCTOR: I don’t like it much either, but most rituals involve some kind of blood or another. Blood’s old magic, it’s almost as powerful as the power of a Name if used in the right hands. Or the wrong ones, as it happens.
DEAN: Okay, so we need blood? Let’s get some.
DOCTOR: Not just any blood, it won’t work otherwise. We need to specialise a bit.
SAM: Specialise how?
DOCTOR: Half the reason this is all so difficult is because by now all those souls are so intertwined with Castiel’s Grace that trying to just yank them out would rip him apart no matter how we did it. We need the blood of someone with a bond to him to stop that from happening.
DONNA: What, like… family or something?
DOCTOR: Not quite, something more than that, an actual, physical bond to Cas’s Grace that’ll hold him together here.
BOBBY: Is that sort of thing even possible?
DOCTOR: [His eyes flick to DEAN.] You tell me.
DEAN: Why are you looking at me?
DOCTOR: Oh, I think you know why. That mark on your arm, did you really think that that was just a scar?
DEAN: How do you know about that?
DOCTOR: Oh well, I. May have been forced to read one or two of the Supernatural books by an enthusiastic evangelist in the future. They’re bestsellers in by the time you get to the 51st century, you can’t get away from them. It just took me a while to make the connection, that’s all…
DONNA: Wait, there’s books about this lot?
SAM: You really don’t want to know.
DOCTOR: Yyyeah, long story, but the point is, that handprint isn’t just a scar, it’s a mark made by Cas’s Grace on your soul. You’re basically carrying a part of him around with you.
DEAN: So what, this means you need to use my blood for this ritual thing?
DOCTOR: Only if you give it completely freely, which is why I need to ask now.
DONNA: What’s so important about him giving it freely?
DOCTOR: The ritual won’t work otherwise. If there’s even the slightest bit of doubt or hesitation or reluctance, it’ll just be unsuccessful. Or backfire, or do something else that’ll make things worse.
DEAN: And you were going to tell us this when?
DOCTOR: I just did, didn’t I? I don’t let anyone walk into something like this blind, especially when it’s so important, which is why I need to ask you this now so you can make your mind up.
DEAN: Why wouldn’t I say yes?
DOCTOR: You don’t understand, this isn’t the sort of thing you can decide in a split second. This thing, this part of the ritual, it relies on whatever lies between you and Castiel, which means you have to be sure beyond all shadow of doubt. And I’m sorry, but knowing what I know now I have to be sure you mean it, and so do you. I’m not risking causing more damage here.
DEAN: You’ve got to be kidding me. We just spent all this time working our asses off to put this together for nothing—
DOCTOR: I never said that. That’s up to you now. I’m sorry to put this much pressure on you, Dean, I really am, but there’s no one else I can ask. [He reaches over to put a hand on DEAN’s shoulder.] Just tell us when you’ve worked it out and we’ll figure things out from there.
✎ ✎ ✎
[DEAN is outside in the yard when the DOCTOR wanders out, coming to lean on a nearby car.]
DOCTOR: I was starting to think you’d got lost out here.
DEAN: What happened to making the decision by myself?
DOCTOR: I said you had to make up your own mind, I never said you had to be on your own to do it. Besides, I wanted some fresh air. How are you feeling?
DEAN: Is this some kind of British thing, wanting to talk about your feelings all the time?
DOCTOR: Oi, less of the British, ta very much, I’m not even human! Donna corner you earlier then?
DEAN: Something like that. Is she always like that?
DOCTOR: Oh yeah. Wouldn’t have her any other way. You know, the funny thing about you, Dean, is you’re this massive contradiction. I mean, sure, your entire world, when you’re not trying to save the world at large, that is, is centred on you and keeping your family safe, but even then I don’t think you realise your own importance.
DEAN: Trust me, Doctor, I’ve had way too many people telling me how important I was to their plan or whatever to forget it.
DOCTOR: No, I don’t mean anything like as a part of Heaven’s plan or even as the Righteous Man or any of that, I mean you personally, to other people. I mean, do you even realise just how important you are? Take Castiel as an example, he was alive for years, millions and millions of years assigned to watch over Earth and battle demons and do God’s will and all those other things angels do, never changing, just following orders. And I’m not exaggerating that by the way, I was there for some of it. And then you came along - you, this human, this one man in a long long line of humans before and after you, and you had more of an effect on him than anything else in his entire existence up to now.
DEAN: Is that supposed to make me feel better? Look what’s happened, man!
DOCTOR: You showed him free will. In my book that’s a good thing, even if you do make the wrong choices sometimes that’s all part of the package.
DEAN: If I do this, and it goes wrong—
DOCTOR: Then it’ll be just as much my fault as yours, if not more. I’m the one who came up with the idea and who’ll be saying the words. [He looks at DEAN sharply.] Is that what all this delay is about? You’re really not hesitant about giving it at all, are you, not for the obvious reason, you’re just worried you’ll make things worse!
DEAN: My life hasn’t exactly been a shining example of stuff going right, okay.
DOCTOR: Mine neither a lot of the time, but on a good day you can still save someone.
DEAN: And today’s a good day, huh.
DOCTOR: Oh, I’m feeling pretty hopeful. How about you?
✎ ✎ ✎
DOCTOR: [Bursting into the room covered in the group’s research in a hurry] Right, come on everyone, pack the stuff and into the TARDIS, we’ve got somewhere to be.
SAM: Where’s the fire?
BOBBY: Have you forgotten why we just went through the trouble of writin’ ourselves a whole new ritual in the first place, y’idgit, or are you really that stupid? And why’re we all gettin’ a field trip in that box of yours, anyhow?
DOCTOR: [As he gathers bits of paper and ingredients into a bag] Faster than flying and much more precise, not to mention safer. We’ve got somewhere to be.
DONNA: Where though, I mean, did Dean make his mind up, does this mean we’re ready?
DOCTOR: No, it means we’re going to find somewhere as far from civilisation as we can that’s got somewhere convenient to put wards up, and then we’re gonna get ready. Something as big as what we’re trying, we need a lot of empty space, think football stadium levels only bigger.
DONNA: So not a football stadium at all, then. [The DOCTOR gives her a look, unable to talk with a book wedged in his mouth to leave his hands free to grab things.] Oh, fine, we’re going! Need any help?
DOCTOR: Mmmphmmph— [DONNA rolls her eyes and takes the book from his mouth.] Thanks Donna. I need all our notes and anything else we need to work this ritual in the TARDIS along with all of you. [With that, he dashes off, vanishing into the TARDIS. DONNA glances at the others, who have varying amounts of stuff in their hands.]
DONNA: Well don’t just stand there gawking, let’s go!
[BOBBY shakes his head, muttering something under his breath that sounds distinctly like “idgits” before following DONNA into the TARDIS, leaving DEAN and SAM alone in the room.]
SAM: So, you made up your mind, huh?
DEAN: Come on, Sam, I can’t just let him blow himself up, no matter how off the rails he’s gone.
SAM: But you’re sure about this, right?
DEAN: [Scoffs in annoyance and picks up a duffel bag] No, I’m just saying that. Jesus, Sam, of course I’m sure!
SAM: I’m just saying, Dean—
DEAN: Yeah, well don’t. Come on, we’re wasting time. [And with that, he heads for the TARDIS, SAM sighing anxiously before following him in.]
DOCTOR: [Glancing up from the console to check that everyone - and everything - is inside] So. Ready for this, everyone?
[He barely waits for a nod from the others before he pushes down the lever and sends the TARDIS into dematerialisation.]
✎ ✎ ✎
[The TARDIS has taken the group to an abandoned building somewhere in the middle of nowhere; the group are taking to all corners of the building, drawing symbols and wards and marks, checking supplies, making up a bowl full of ingredients. As DONNA finishes up one last symbol, the DOCTOR gently prods her shoulder.]
DOCTOR: That’s slightly wrong, that mark there should go on the other side. [DONNA pulls a face but does as he says.] Perfect! Alright, is that everything?
SAM: Everything that was in our notes.
DOCTOR: Right then. Suppose all that’s left to do is to call Cas. [Pause.] Castiel, it’s the Doctor again. If you’re still up for this, then… well, we’re ready.
[More silence for a bit. Then all of a sudden:]
CASTIEL: [Not meeting anyone’s eyes] … Hello.
[Everyone’s staring. For DONNA it’s with concern; the DOCTOR has a grim look on his face; BOBBY, SAM and DEAN look as though they can’t decide whether to be surprised, concerned, cautious or worried.]
DEAN: Cas.
DOCTOR: Dean, are you ready?
DEAN: [Nods after a beat, rolling up his sleeves] I’m ready. Let’s do it.
CASTIEL: [Slowly, with a sort of disbelief:] You’re using your own blood?
DEAN: [A little sharply.] What’s it to you, it wouldn’t be the first time I’ve done it for a ritual.
CASTIEL: But that wasn’t—
DEAN: What, you’re saying you think I wouldn’t do it to save your life?
CASTIEL: [Coldly:] You were quite clear about your intent to stop me by any means necessary.
DEAN: Damn it, Cas— look. Look, okay, I know like I said before, there’s a lot of bad water under the bridge. But I’ve thought about this, and no matter how pissed we are at each other, I’m not gonna leave you hanging now. We’ll sort out the rest of the crap later.
CASTIEL: Dean—
DEAN: [Holding his arm out to the DOCTOR, he glares defiantly at CASTIEL.] Do it, Doctor.
[The DOCTOR nods and makes a cut as gently as he can, adding DEAN’s blood to the bowl of other ingredients. SAM moves to dress DEAN’s wound as the DOCTOR takes in a deep breath.]
DOCTOR: Cas, you might wanna stand in the middle of those markings there. Everyone else stand back.
[As the DOCTOR starts to draw more Gallifreyan symbols at certain points around the room and chant softly in his native tongue, the others watch anxiously, waiting.]
DONNA: [murmuring softly] Please let this work.
✎ ✎ ✎
[The DOCTOR’s home-made ritual continues. As the DOCTOR continues to chant softly, CASTIEL slowly starts glowing - barely noticeably at first, but it gradually gets brighter and brighter, until the others have to shield their eyes and turn away from the light. DONNA reaches out to grasp DEAN’s shoulder in some measure of comfort, until finally - finally, as the rhythm of the words falling from the DOCTOR’s mouth changes, the light suddenly shoots outwards, like an explosion without any damage. It’s blinding, and the entire building glows white, but the DOCTOR keeps resolutely chanting even as his eyes screw shut against the glare. Eventually, it fades. Everyone looks up, opening their eyes.]
DOCTOR: [Breathing out heavily] Blimey, I forgot how much heavy spellworking took it out of you… [He seems a little dazed, not quite having got it together just yet.]
DEAN: Where’s Cas?
[Everyone exchanges looks, startled, then glance to where he was standing. CASTIEL’s prone form is lying there, limp, unmoving.]
DEAN: Dammit— [He shrugs off DONNA’s hand and rushes to crouch down next to CASTIEL, swiftly followed by the DOCTOR.] Cas? Damn it, Cas, wake up, you sonnuvabitch— [DEAN looks up at the DOCTOR, who’s crouching over CASTIEL with a stony expression, hands feeling for the pulse points in his wrists and neck before he places two hands on either side of his head.] Is he - did we -
DOCTOR: No. [His voice takes on a tone of wonder, with joy not too far behind.] No, he’s still in there. [He laughs a little, incredulously] We did it. We worked. No souls left in there or anything, he’s just unconscious for a bit, that’s all. Which well, angel or not, anyone would be after detoxing millions of souls. [He laughs again.] Oh, but I’m very good.
DONNA: [While beaming] Yeah, alright you, don’t get a swollen head.
SAM: So where are the souls? I mean you have to have sent them somewhere, right?
DOCTOR: Oh, they’re in that jar over there.
SAM: … the jar. The pottery jar you had us draw symbols over before telling us not to touch it?
DOCTOR: That’s the one. Nice big carry case for all those souls, it’s almost like one of those things you put your pet in when you take it to the vet, really. It’s only a temporary solution, but it’ll do until I can put them somewhere they can’t do any harm.
DEAN: And how are they all fitting in there?
DOCTOR: [Innocently.] Oh, it’s bigger on the inside, of course. [He grins at DEAN’s expression.] Were you really expecting anything else? Come on, we should pack up and get him somewhere more comfortable where he can sleep this off. I’ll leave it to you and your brother to move him, shall I?
✎ ✎ ✎
[CASTIEL is lying unconscious on a sofa in BOBBY’s house. SAM is nearby, looking up something on his laptop, when the angel stirs, blinking slowly. SAM looks up.]
SAM: Cas, you’re awake.
CASTIEL: Sam? [His expression runs through confusion, realisation, then slight guilt.] … Sam, I owe you an apology. What I did—
SAM: [Holding up a hand] Hey, don’t sweat that right now. I’m not - God, Cas, I’m not saying it’s alright, ‘cause it’s really not, but I’m fine.
CASTIEL: … still, at the very least I should apologise.
SAM: Yeah, well, I kinda think we’ve all got some apologising to do, you know?
DEAN: [From the doorway] Cas awake?
SAM: Just now. Uh… [Packing up his laptop] I’m just gonna go tell the others. Mind taking over for a bit? [With that said, SAM beats a hasty exit.]
DEAN: [While pulling up a chair:] So… that’s it then, huh. Back to normal, no souls or anything?
CASTIEL: It would seem that way.
DEAN: And… how’re you feeling?
CASTIEL: Very, very drained. But otherwise, what I suppose you’d describe as normal.
DEAN: Guess a soul-detox’d do that to you, huh. [An awkward silence ensues.] … so what happens now?
CASTIEL: … I believe that Heaven is, understandably, closed to me right now. I don’t know yet what it is I’ll do.
DEAN: You could stick around for a bit, maybe.
CASTIEL: No.
DEAN: What the hell do you mean, “no”? So that’s it, you finally get that popping open Purgatory and swallowing all those souls was a bad idea, and now it’s all over you don’t want to stick around and try and work things out?
CASTIEL: Why does it always have to be on your terms, Dean?
DEAN: What?
CASTIEL: This… bond we’ve had between us for the past few years. Almost everything about it has been dictated by you. [CASTIEL sighs.] You’re right. One day we will have to… “work things out,” as you say. But I can’t yet. I’m sorry, but I can’t keep on being that angel that you only call when it’s convenient for you.
DEAN: Hey, that’s not—
CASTIEL: Isn’t it?
DEAN: No!
[Before either of them can say anything else, the DOCTOR appears in the doorway, looking in half-curiously, half-apprehensively.]
DOCTOR: Everything alright?
DEAN: … yeah. Fine.
✎ ✎ ✎
[Everyone stands in front of the TARDIS in the Singer Salvage Yard; the DOCTOR is half-leaning on the TARDIS while DONNA is inside the doorway, smiling at the other four.]
DOCTOR: Well, we’d best be on our way. Whole universe still left to see out there, just waiting for us.
CASTIEL: So you’re moving on again.
DOCTOR: Oh, always. I can’t stand still for all that long, you know that.
CASTIEL: Well, I hope that next time we meet it isn’t too far behind in your own timestream.
DEAN: Can I get that in English, please?
DOCTOR: We keep meeting up in the wrong order. It’s all a bit wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey.
DONNA: Do you meet anyone in the right order?
DOCTOR: Some people! Time travel’s confusing, you should know that by now!
DONNA: It’s a wonder you keep your head screwed on the right way, you. [To CASTIEL] And you, if you can’t go back up to Heaven or anything you should come with us, you know. [She hits the DOCTOR lightly on the arm.] Go on, Spaceman, tell him! I can’t believe you’ve known each other for like, gazillions of years and you’ve never asked him before now!
DOCTOR: Well he wouldn’t have come before now, he had things to do.
DONNA: Yeah, but now though?
DOCTOR: Now that’s up to him. [At DONNA’S unimpressed look:] Blimey, you’re not gonna let me be unless I actually ask, are you? [DONNA’S look grows even more unimpressed.] I’m joking! Actually, Cas, I’d love it if you wanted to come. There’s room in the TARDIS for more than just me and her.
[CASTIEL hesitates, glancing back at the WINCHESTERS and BOBBY for a brief moment before he turns back to the DOCTOR and DONNA.]
CASTIEL: If you are willing to have me, then… yes.
[For a moment, DEAN looks as if he’s about to open his mouth to say something, but thinks better of it at the last minute.]
DONNA: That’s what we’re saying, Angel Boy! [CASTIEL shoots a puzzled look at both DONNA and the DOCTOR; the DOCTOR gives him a look as if to say “just roll with it” as DONNA comes far enough out of the TARDIS to give CASTIEL’s arm a small tug.] Come on!
[The DOCTOR watches the two of them disappear into the TARDIS with a bemused look before turning back to the others.]
DOCTOR: He’ll be alright. He just needs time, that’s all.
DEAN: Hey. [As the DOCTOR looks up, puzzled:] You’ll take care of him, right?
DOCTOR: If I don’t, she will. She’s good at that.
DONNA: [From inside the TARDIS] Oi! Who’s she, the cat’s mother?
DOCTOR: Oo heck, I think that’s my cue to leave. [He smiles at the three men.] Now you three, take care of yourselves, alright? And stay in touch, if you place a call to the time vortex you should get through at least 70% of the time. Well, maybe more like 60. Well, closer to 50.
SAM: We’ll just take our chances and hope for the best. [The DOCTOR grins at him.]
DOCTOR: Right then, I’ll be off. This won’t be the last you see of me, you know.
DEAN: Hopefully we won’t run into any other aliens before then.
[Grinning at that, the DOCTOR gives a small wave before heading into the TARDIS. A few seconds later it begins to dematerialise; END OF EPISODE TWO.]
Fandom: Superwho (Doctor Who/Supernatural)
Characters: The Tenth Doctor, Donna Noble, Dean Winchester, Bobby Singer, Sam Winchester, Castiel
Pairing?: None (as of yet)
Rating: PG-13
Summary: SuperWho episode two: with the souls inside Castiel able to go into meltdown at any moment, the Doctor and Donna seek out the help of Bobby and the Winchesters in making a ritual from scratch to save him.
Notes: SUPERWHO BANDWAGON AHOY. Second episode of the Superwho series I'm serialising on my tumblr. That site isn't good for some people's internet connections, so I'm also posting them here as I finish each episode. :'D Imagine each image+dialogue combo as part of a scene in an episode, and you're golden.
Warnings: BE WARNED FIRST OF ALL THAT THIS IS AN IMAGE-HEAVY POST, NOT DIAL-UP FRIENDLY. Other than that, spoilers for the end of season 6 of Supernatural; questionable blending of the physics and mythologies of the two series together; unashamed fix-it for the s6 finale; shamelessly self-indulgent writing.
DONNA: But what do you mean, meltdown, I mean you can't actually mean--
DOCTOR: I can. Think of the souls as - actually don't think of them as souls at all, think of them as energy, masses and masses of it, and imagine all the power that comes with that.
DONNA: Enough power to turn someone into a god, right?
DOCTOR: Yes, but it's more than that, people, any people, aren't made to contain so much artificially gained energy, not anything that doesn't come naturally. If anyone tried they'd burn up within the first day.
DONNA: But Cas is still here.
DOCTOR: Yes but he's not human, he's an angel, and that's literally the only reason he hasn't yet. Angels are from a bubble universe attached to the side of this one, you'd call it Heaven, they're made of stronger stuff than that. Hence why Cas became a sort of god, he lasted long enough to actually make use of all that power. The thing is, once you've got power like that it's difficult to let it go.
DONNA: Speaking from experience?
DOCTOR: Not mine. A friend's... But power like that, it changes you, it takes whatever was in your head at the moment you took it in and amplifies it. The thing is, fifty million souls, nothing in the universe could sustain that much energy within themselves for an unlimited amount of time, let alone energy that was sentient itself, sooner or later they'd die! Well, maybe the Eternals could do it, but they're not even of this universe half the time...
DONNA: Hang on, so that's it, he's gonna die?
DOCTOR: I wish it was just that. Fifty million souls plus an angel's Grace, that's one big nuclear bomb ready to go off, and when it does that's half the planet gone. If we're lucky.
DONNA: How long have we got?
DOCTOR: I dunno. Days, weeks, months, maybe, it's impossible to tell.
DONNA: Well we're gonna do something about it, right?
DOCTOR: Oh, Donna Noble, it's like you don't even know me. Come on! We've got an angel to defuse and we can't do that if we stand around here all day.
DOCTOR: Castiel! There you are, I was worried you’d flown off somewhere. Listen, this is important, and I’m sorry, but I’ve got some bad news.
CASTIEL: What about?
DOCTOR: About you. Those souls, they’re not just giving you power, they’re ripping you apart, or they will do. I know you don’t want to, but you have to let them go.
CASTIEL: I can’t.
DOCTOR: Oh for heaven’s sake, come on, Cas, this isn’t the time to be proud—
CASTIEL: You misunderstand me. I can’t.
DOCTOR: Can’t-can’t, or…? D’you mind if I…?
CASTIEL: I imagine you will regardless of whether I say yes or no.
DOCTOR: Pretty much, yeah. [He crouches down a little, staring into CASTIEL’s eyes]
DONNA: What are you doing, reading his mind?
DOCTOR: Sort of, now shhh, I’m concentrating. Oh, I was afraid of that.
DONNA: What now?
DOCTOR: He’s right, he can’t get rid of them. I mean, literally, physically can’t, it’s not a matter of will or won’t anymore. [To CASTIEL:] How long have you known about this?
CASTIEL: Long enough. It didn’t seem to be so much of a problem until recently.
DONNA: Not a problem? You’re being torn apart, how can that not seem to be a problem?
DOCTOR: Because until recently, I doubt he even realised that. Well, fifty million souls cushioning you from yourself, worming their way in there, anyone could overlook it until it was too late.
CASTIEL: Doctor, I’m not blind. I went into this knowing the risks.
DOCTOR: And thought you’d dodged a bullet until the high wore off, hm?
CASTIEL: If you want to put it that way, then yes.
DONNA: Look, this is all fantastic talking, but what are we going to do? I mean, no offence, but you could go off at any minute!
DOCTOR: Yeah, still working on that, thanks Donna. I’ll tell you what we’re not gonna do though. We’re not gonna let half of this planet get nuked, and I am not going to let you die. Not on my watch.
CASTIEL: Where did you send Donna?
DOCTOR: The TARDIS library. The one near the swimming pool, not the one next to the observatory, I’ve got a few books in there that might come in handy. I might be good, but something like this is gonna take research. Research and a bit of help.
CASTIEL: Help from where?
DOCTOR: Bobby Singer and his library, that’s where.
CASTIEL: … I see. I don’t think I - perhaps it’s best that I shouldn’t come. [The DOCTOR gives him a quizzical look.] We didn’t exactly part on the best of terms.
DOCTOR: You’re all gonna have to stop dancing around each other sooner or later, you know. What with everything that’s happening I’d prefer if it was sooner. [CASTIEL doesn’t answer; the DOCTOR’s expression softens.] Oh, alright. I’ll go in there and force them to listen, shall I? Probably have more luck that way, they’d have to duct tape my mouth shut to stop me talking.
CASTIEL: Sometimes I doubt that even that would have much of an effect.
DOCTOR: Did you just— you did! You made a joke in English! [He shakes his head in wonder, grinning a bit, before glancing towards the corridor leading out of the control room.] Where’s Donna got to? It doesn’t take that long to get to the library, I’m sure I told her the short cut…
CASTIEL: Doctor.
DOCTOR: Hmm?
CASTIEL: Can I tell you something if you promise not to tell another soul?
DOCTOR: Always.
CASTIEL: … I’m. Afraid. More than I’d like to admit.
DOCTOR: Oh, you — come here, you.
CASTIEL: What are you— [CASTIEL’s words are cut off as the DOCTOR pulls him into a hug.]
DOCTOR: I’m giving you a hug, you daft old thing. One that’s probably way overdue.
[The TARDIS materialises in the corner of BOBBY’s library; DEAN and SAM stand up in alarm while BOBBY rushes in from the next room. The DOCTOR and DONNA step out.]
DOCTOR: Right, so! I’ve got good news and bad news—
BOBBY: And d’ya mind not usin’ my house as a parkin’ lot?
DOCTOR: [Looks at him with wide eyes, as if it never occurred to him] Um. Right, sorry about that. But anyway, like I was saying I’ve got good news and bad news, which do you want first?
DEAN: Did you find him?
DOCTOR: As a matter of fact I did, yeah.
DEAN: And?
DOCTOR: And he’s not as far gone mentally as you lot made him out to be, which is the good news. Whatever the souls did to his mind, it’s there, but it’s worn off a bit since that first night.
SAM: What’s the bad news?
DOCTOR: The bad news is that you were right, he’s full of nukes and he could explode at any minute, are you happy?
DEAN: Dammit, I told him this was a bad idea! Where is he?
DONNA: He’s not coming, sorry. And to be honest with you, pretty boy, I don’t blame him.
DEAN: And just what the hell’s that supposed to mean?
DONNA: Are you having a laugh?
DEAN: I’m not the one who worked with a demon to pop open frigging Purgatory—
DONNA: Which I’d bet a million quid mightn’t have happened if someone had actually been with him all that time he was fighting, instead of—
DEAN: Listen here, sweetheart, you don’t know the first—
DONNA: Oi! Don’t you call me sweetheart and interrupt me—
DOCTOR: Both of you, shut up! Now listen, we can call each other names and point fingers at each other about who did what as much as you like later on, but right now, I’d quite like to save my friend, alright?
[Shocked silence.]
DOCTOR: Right, thank you. Sam, get on your laptop, I’ve got a list of things for you to research, Dean, Donna, you two hit the books, I’ve got a pile I brought with me from the TARDIS, start with those and see if there’s anything in Bobby’s collection which’ll be useful. Bobby, you’re with me.
BOBBY: Doin’ what, exactly?
DOCTOR: Brainstorming, if we’re gonna figure out a way to get this much power out of Castiel safely then we need to work together.
DONNA: You heard the Spaceman, now let’s get a move on!
[DEAN and DONNA are poring over some books in mixed concentration, frustration, and boredom.]
DEAN: What does he even want us to look for anyway?
DONNA: I dunno, something useful I guess. The thing about the Doctor’s plans is that he usually makes them up as he goes along, it’s how he works best.
DEAN: Great. Just great.
DONNA: There’s no need to be like that. Look, I know you don’t know him, but I do, and he’ll figure this one out. He always does.
DEAN: This is a pretty big one to figure out.
DONNA: He saves a planet every other day.
DEAN: … touche.
DONNA: Dean, can I talk to you about something?
DEAN: If it’s about Cas, then no.
DONNA: Brilliant, all the more reason for me to ask.
DEAN: Donna, I can’t, alright?
DONNA: Bollocks, of course you can. Not talking’s part of what got you into this mess, isn’t it? So talk to me, just this once. It’s not gonna kill you.
DEAN: I wouldn’t even know where to start.
DONNA: Okay then, let me start for you. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve talked to Castiel myself, and I think he’s a bit of a stubborn idiot. But see, he was fighting that war all that time all by himself, you must’ve known he was gonna have to get up to some shady stuff if no one told him otherwise. I mean, didn’t you ever ask, not even once? Or, I dunno, think to let him know you were worried about him?
DEAN: I told him he was family.
DONNA: You told him he used to be. And I’ve seen what the Spaceman can be like if he’s left on his own. You see, the thing is, people like the Doctor, and that angel of yours, they’re brilliant and they make you see things like no one else has before and you love them to bits… but they need people like us to stop them. To take care of them.
DEAN: You think I don’t know that? How the hell d’you think we got into this mess?
DONNA: Don’t give me that. If you knew all that, why didn’t you help him? All you did was wait till it was too late before giving him the boot! [She sighs.] Look, I know we’ve been getting at each other’s throats since the Doctor got us here, and I’m not saying I know everything about you two, but promise me something. Try and patch things up if you can, yeah? Take it from someone who’s seen it, people are a lot more dangerous when they’re like that.
DEAN: Like what?
DONNA: Lonely.
DONNA: Oi, Spaceman! Have you got a minute?
DOCTOR: [Looking up from the book he’s poring over with BOBBY, eyes wide behind his glasses:] Yeah, what for?
DONNA: I was thinking right, you said this isn’t the first time you’ve seen something like this happen, and it happened to one of your friends, right? So what I was thinking was, can’t we just do what you did last time to get rid of all that energy?
DOCTOR: Well, the thing is it’s not quite as simple as just getting rid of the energy, not with as much of it as we’re dealing with, and especially since that energy’s souls. Something this big needs the energy to go from one place to the other, an energy transfer.
DONNA: Right, so how did you do that last time?
DOCTOR: Well, last time I used myself as part of the energy transfer.
DONNA: And…?
DOCTOR: And well, I — do we really have to talk about this?
DONNA: Well it’s not as if it’s anything embarrassing, is it? … Is it, though?
DOCTOR: Well - no, not embarrassing, it’s just that - well, last time it happened, with my friend, I kissed her to get the energy out. [Defensively, at everyone’s looks:] It was a simple energy transfer, alright, I didn’t have much time to come up with anything else!
DEAN: Wait wait wait, so now your plan’s to kiss him?
DONNA: Well, if you don’t want the Spaceman snogging him, pretty boy, you could always do it. [At DEAN’S glare:] I’m just saying!
DOCTOR: Right, anyway! No, actually, that’s not the plan, ‘cause it wouldn’t work in this case as it is. The only reason it worked last time was because it was energy from the time vortex, literally the stuff that time is made of. I’m a Time Lord so I have a sort of affinity for it, like attracts like, but even then it forced me to regenerate.
SAM: Regenerate?
DOCTOR: Time Lord trick, sort of a way to cheat death. My entire body changes instead of dying. Keeps me looking young. [He grins cheekily.]
SAM: [Disbelievingly, with a sort of huffed laugh:] Wow.
DONNA: Okay, so snogging him’s out as a plan unless anyone fancies some of that, so what are we doing instead?
DOCTOR: Going native.
BOBBY: Meanin’?
DOCTOR: Meaning a ritual. Not any we can find in a book, we’re gonna have to cobble together our own from scratch using other ones as a guide. I mean, no one’s ever swallowed all the souls from Purgatory before, no one would have even thought of it, so it’s not as if there’s a precedent for us to find a quick fix for.
BOBBY: You’re sayin’ we make up our own ritual. Us? Right now?
DOCTOR: Yeah.
DEAN: Will it fix him?
DOCTOR: If we do it right. Which we will, if you lot get back on those books and find me anything which might come in handy for it. Stuff about energy transfer, souls, separating out things that have become tangled up, anything which seems even vaguely related, bookmark it. We can’t afford to leave anything to chance.
BOBBY: Y’know, if we pull this thing off it’s gonna be the most patchwork ritual I’ve ever worked. We musta pulled stuff from every source I know for this thing. And then a few that I don’t. I ain’t heard of a carrionite or an eternal before.
DOCTOR: The Carrionites knew a thing or two about spellmaking and words. You lot solve problems with numbers, they built a society - well, for a given value of what you’d call a society - based on using words in the right order and shape, they could do anything with that. Human spellmaking’s based on it, or well, the stuff you don’t get from demons or angels is.
SAM: And the Eternals?
DOCTOR: You’d think of them as gods. Or concepts, some of them. Powerful beings, like Death, for example, they don’t even exist inside this universe half the time. After the Time War most of them fled, but I’ve run into them on occasion, picked up a few things that’d come in handy.
SAM: I gotta say, trying to pull all of this together is making my head spin.
BOBBY: Well of course it is! We’re writin’ up a ritual from scratch, boy, you thought it was goin’ to be easy? What with the list of ingredients we’ve narrowed down alone I’m gonna need to restock after all this.
DEAN: So what are we doing this crazy alien ritual of yours in anyway, I mean, Latin? Enochian?
DOCTOR: Neither, actually. No offence, but no language on Earth is precise enough for something like this, and we need precision more than anything else. Enochian’s not much better, I mean, it’s all very well and good for angelic rituals, but this needs a little something more.
DEAN: A little something like what?
DOCTOR: My language. From Gallifrey, my home planet.
DONNA: You’re gonna use your language? Seriously, though? I don’t think I’ve ever really seen it, except for on your post-it notes and the TARDIS computer. I don’t think I’ve ever even heard you speak it before.
DOCTOR: Well. It’s not like there’s anyone to speak it to…
SAM: But - your language? That’s amazing, I mean, a language spoken by a species that can time travel must have—
DOCTOR: At least twenty different tenses more than human languages, yeah. You lot have never had to deal with what happens when personal timelines overlap or don’t match up, or when things are in the same place but in different dimensions. Honestly I’ve always wondered how you coped…
SAM: Can I see it? Or - I dunno, could you speak some for us?
DONNA: Oh, come on, he’s a person, not a science exhibit!
DOCTOR: No, Donna, it’s okay, I’m gonna have to speak it later on anyway, I might as well warm up. Pass me a bit of paper and a pen, Sam, and in the meantime — [The DOCTOR pauses, almost in trepidation, takes a breath - and when he next speaks, it’s in Gallifreyan; a rolling, flowing language full of vowels that’s more like a song than talking. In the DOCTOR’s voice, it sounds almost like excitable birdsong made more human.]
DONNA: … that was your language?
DOCTOR: Yeah.
DONNA: It’s beautiful. [She smiles at the DOCTOR; he gives her a small one back.]
DEAN: What did you just say?
DOCTOR: Roughly translated into English, I just told you that the next time I will have seen you will be the second time you’ll meet me, but it was the fifth time I met you in a place that won’t have not existed. [He frowns while everyone else stares at him blankly, and returns to his piece of paper.] I think I might have screwed up a tense or two there, it all gets a bit muddy in translation…
BOBBY: Don’t worry, we get it, your language is better for this than ours.
DEAN: Why are you drawing all those circles?
DONNA: That’s what it looks like written down, you idiot.
DEAN: You’re gonna do this ritual with a bunch of circles. Really?
SAM: Dude, seriously, knock it off, that’s his language you’re insulting.
BOBBY: If it gets the job done he can use double Dutch for all I care. Now will one of you idjits get over here and help me figure out how to string this thing together while he figures out which of those “circles” we’re usin’, or am I the one doin’ all the hard work here?
[DONNA has excused herself and slipped away for a little bit, walking some way down the road from BOBBY’s salvage yard until she’s a good distance away from anything else. Once she reaches what she thinks is a good distance away, she glances upwards and lets out a breath.]
DONNA: Um… Castiel? Blimey, I feel like an idiot doing this… um, it’s Donna. I was just wondering if you wanted to talk or something, I dunno. It’s just me, in case you’re wondering. No one else is here, I just popped out ‘cause—
CASTIEL: Hello, Donna.
DONNA:[Turning with a slight shriek] Blimey! Give a girl some warning next time, would you? Popping out of nowhere like that, you’ll end up giving someone a heart attack!
CASTIEL: Apologies. What did you want?
DONNA: I just wanted to see how you were holding up, I guess. Thought you might want some company or something.
CASTIEL: That’s… thoughtful, but unnecessary.
DONNA: Sure it is. The Doctor’s working everyone hard, in case you wanted to know. Got us putting together a ritual from scratch and everything.
CASTIEL: He’s creating his own?
DONNA: Of course he is, you know he doesn’t like to do anything by halves. I dunno, I just thought maybe you’d want an update, seeing as how it’s all about you. What about you, though. I mean, what have you been doing?
CASTIEL: For good or ill, it seems as though I won’t have this power for much longer. I’m making use of it while I can.
DONNA: Right, something tells me I’d be better off not asking about that. You know, it’s funny. With all the things I’ve seen, travelling with the Doctor, I never thought this’d be one of the things I’d end up doing.
CASTIEL: What?
DONNA: Well, talking to an angel, a god even, I mean - aliens is one thing, but this is mental! Gramps has never been the praying type, he wouldn’t even go to church half the time, but my old dad used to make me say my prayers every night, all proper and everything. I dunno, I think after I got older, I started thinking maybe no one was really listening. No offence.
CASTIEL: There’s always someone listening. There’s just not always an answer.
DONNA: Same thing in the end, isn’t it.
CASTIEL: … Perhaps.
DONNA: Lord, just listen to the two of us. I’m giving Betty from down the street a run for her money with all this talk. [She sighs.] It’s gonna be alright, though, you know that, right?
CASTIEL: You seem so sure of that.
DONNA: Well. After being with the Spaceman for long enough, you start thinking nothing’s impossible anymore, really. Just a bit unlikely, that’s what he says. I just thought you needed to hear someone else say it.
DONNA: How are we doing?
DOCTOR: Oh, there you are! Where did you wander off to?
DONNA: I just went for a walk to clear my head, calm down. How have things been back here?
BOBBY: Well, we think we’ve got most of what we need down. Just need to run over it a couple more times, check we haven’t missed anything vital or put somethin’ in where it don’t need to be.
SAM: We’ve already been checking over it as we go, but better safe than sorry.
DOCTOR: Well, there’s at least one more thing we need. Something very important, actually, and I need to get permission for it now.
DONNA: Okay, what is it?
DOCTOR: Blood.
DONNA: Blood?
DOCTOR: I don’t like it much either, but most rituals involve some kind of blood or another. Blood’s old magic, it’s almost as powerful as the power of a Name if used in the right hands. Or the wrong ones, as it happens.
DEAN: Okay, so we need blood? Let’s get some.
DOCTOR: Not just any blood, it won’t work otherwise. We need to specialise a bit.
SAM: Specialise how?
DOCTOR: Half the reason this is all so difficult is because by now all those souls are so intertwined with Castiel’s Grace that trying to just yank them out would rip him apart no matter how we did it. We need the blood of someone with a bond to him to stop that from happening.
DONNA: What, like… family or something?
DOCTOR: Not quite, something more than that, an actual, physical bond to Cas’s Grace that’ll hold him together here.
BOBBY: Is that sort of thing even possible?
DOCTOR: [His eyes flick to DEAN.] You tell me.
DEAN: Why are you looking at me?
DOCTOR: Oh, I think you know why. That mark on your arm, did you really think that that was just a scar?
DEAN: How do you know about that?
DOCTOR: Oh well, I. May have been forced to read one or two of the Supernatural books by an enthusiastic evangelist in the future. They’re bestsellers in by the time you get to the 51st century, you can’t get away from them. It just took me a while to make the connection, that’s all…
DONNA: Wait, there’s books about this lot?
SAM: You really don’t want to know.
DOCTOR: Yyyeah, long story, but the point is, that handprint isn’t just a scar, it’s a mark made by Cas’s Grace on your soul. You’re basically carrying a part of him around with you.
DEAN: So what, this means you need to use my blood for this ritual thing?
DOCTOR: Only if you give it completely freely, which is why I need to ask now.
DONNA: What’s so important about him giving it freely?
DOCTOR: The ritual won’t work otherwise. If there’s even the slightest bit of doubt or hesitation or reluctance, it’ll just be unsuccessful. Or backfire, or do something else that’ll make things worse.
DEAN: And you were going to tell us this when?
DOCTOR: I just did, didn’t I? I don’t let anyone walk into something like this blind, especially when it’s so important, which is why I need to ask you this now so you can make your mind up.
DEAN: Why wouldn’t I say yes?
DOCTOR: You don’t understand, this isn’t the sort of thing you can decide in a split second. This thing, this part of the ritual, it relies on whatever lies between you and Castiel, which means you have to be sure beyond all shadow of doubt. And I’m sorry, but knowing what I know now I have to be sure you mean it, and so do you. I’m not risking causing more damage here.
DEAN: You’ve got to be kidding me. We just spent all this time working our asses off to put this together for nothing—
DOCTOR: I never said that. That’s up to you now. I’m sorry to put this much pressure on you, Dean, I really am, but there’s no one else I can ask. [He reaches over to put a hand on DEAN’s shoulder.] Just tell us when you’ve worked it out and we’ll figure things out from there.
[DEAN is outside in the yard when the DOCTOR wanders out, coming to lean on a nearby car.]
DOCTOR: I was starting to think you’d got lost out here.
DEAN: What happened to making the decision by myself?
DOCTOR: I said you had to make up your own mind, I never said you had to be on your own to do it. Besides, I wanted some fresh air. How are you feeling?
DEAN: Is this some kind of British thing, wanting to talk about your feelings all the time?
DOCTOR: Oi, less of the British, ta very much, I’m not even human! Donna corner you earlier then?
DEAN: Something like that. Is she always like that?
DOCTOR: Oh yeah. Wouldn’t have her any other way. You know, the funny thing about you, Dean, is you’re this massive contradiction. I mean, sure, your entire world, when you’re not trying to save the world at large, that is, is centred on you and keeping your family safe, but even then I don’t think you realise your own importance.
DEAN: Trust me, Doctor, I’ve had way too many people telling me how important I was to their plan or whatever to forget it.
DOCTOR: No, I don’t mean anything like as a part of Heaven’s plan or even as the Righteous Man or any of that, I mean you personally, to other people. I mean, do you even realise just how important you are? Take Castiel as an example, he was alive for years, millions and millions of years assigned to watch over Earth and battle demons and do God’s will and all those other things angels do, never changing, just following orders. And I’m not exaggerating that by the way, I was there for some of it. And then you came along - you, this human, this one man in a long long line of humans before and after you, and you had more of an effect on him than anything else in his entire existence up to now.
DEAN: Is that supposed to make me feel better? Look what’s happened, man!
DOCTOR: You showed him free will. In my book that’s a good thing, even if you do make the wrong choices sometimes that’s all part of the package.
DEAN: If I do this, and it goes wrong—
DOCTOR: Then it’ll be just as much my fault as yours, if not more. I’m the one who came up with the idea and who’ll be saying the words. [He looks at DEAN sharply.] Is that what all this delay is about? You’re really not hesitant about giving it at all, are you, not for the obvious reason, you’re just worried you’ll make things worse!
DEAN: My life hasn’t exactly been a shining example of stuff going right, okay.
DOCTOR: Mine neither a lot of the time, but on a good day you can still save someone.
DEAN: And today’s a good day, huh.
DOCTOR: Oh, I’m feeling pretty hopeful. How about you?
DOCTOR: [Bursting into the room covered in the group’s research in a hurry] Right, come on everyone, pack the stuff and into the TARDIS, we’ve got somewhere to be.
SAM: Where’s the fire?
BOBBY: Have you forgotten why we just went through the trouble of writin’ ourselves a whole new ritual in the first place, y’idgit, or are you really that stupid? And why’re we all gettin’ a field trip in that box of yours, anyhow?
DOCTOR: [As he gathers bits of paper and ingredients into a bag] Faster than flying and much more precise, not to mention safer. We’ve got somewhere to be.
DONNA: Where though, I mean, did Dean make his mind up, does this mean we’re ready?
DOCTOR: No, it means we’re going to find somewhere as far from civilisation as we can that’s got somewhere convenient to put wards up, and then we’re gonna get ready. Something as big as what we’re trying, we need a lot of empty space, think football stadium levels only bigger.
DONNA: So not a football stadium at all, then. [The DOCTOR gives her a look, unable to talk with a book wedged in his mouth to leave his hands free to grab things.] Oh, fine, we’re going! Need any help?
DOCTOR: Mmmphmmph— [DONNA rolls her eyes and takes the book from his mouth.] Thanks Donna. I need all our notes and anything else we need to work this ritual in the TARDIS along with all of you. [With that, he dashes off, vanishing into the TARDIS. DONNA glances at the others, who have varying amounts of stuff in their hands.]
DONNA: Well don’t just stand there gawking, let’s go!
[BOBBY shakes his head, muttering something under his breath that sounds distinctly like “idgits” before following DONNA into the TARDIS, leaving DEAN and SAM alone in the room.]
SAM: So, you made up your mind, huh?
DEAN: Come on, Sam, I can’t just let him blow himself up, no matter how off the rails he’s gone.
SAM: But you’re sure about this, right?
DEAN: [Scoffs in annoyance and picks up a duffel bag] No, I’m just saying that. Jesus, Sam, of course I’m sure!
SAM: I’m just saying, Dean—
DEAN: Yeah, well don’t. Come on, we’re wasting time. [And with that, he heads for the TARDIS, SAM sighing anxiously before following him in.]
DOCTOR: [Glancing up from the console to check that everyone - and everything - is inside] So. Ready for this, everyone?
[He barely waits for a nod from the others before he pushes down the lever and sends the TARDIS into dematerialisation.]
[The TARDIS has taken the group to an abandoned building somewhere in the middle of nowhere; the group are taking to all corners of the building, drawing symbols and wards and marks, checking supplies, making up a bowl full of ingredients. As DONNA finishes up one last symbol, the DOCTOR gently prods her shoulder.]
DOCTOR: That’s slightly wrong, that mark there should go on the other side. [DONNA pulls a face but does as he says.] Perfect! Alright, is that everything?
SAM: Everything that was in our notes.
DOCTOR: Right then. Suppose all that’s left to do is to call Cas. [Pause.] Castiel, it’s the Doctor again. If you’re still up for this, then… well, we’re ready.
[More silence for a bit. Then all of a sudden:]
CASTIEL: [Not meeting anyone’s eyes] … Hello.
[Everyone’s staring. For DONNA it’s with concern; the DOCTOR has a grim look on his face; BOBBY, SAM and DEAN look as though they can’t decide whether to be surprised, concerned, cautious or worried.]
DEAN: Cas.
DOCTOR: Dean, are you ready?
DEAN: [Nods after a beat, rolling up his sleeves] I’m ready. Let’s do it.
CASTIEL: [Slowly, with a sort of disbelief:] You’re using your own blood?
DEAN: [A little sharply.] What’s it to you, it wouldn’t be the first time I’ve done it for a ritual.
CASTIEL: But that wasn’t—
DEAN: What, you’re saying you think I wouldn’t do it to save your life?
CASTIEL: [Coldly:] You were quite clear about your intent to stop me by any means necessary.
DEAN: Damn it, Cas— look. Look, okay, I know like I said before, there’s a lot of bad water under the bridge. But I’ve thought about this, and no matter how pissed we are at each other, I’m not gonna leave you hanging now. We’ll sort out the rest of the crap later.
CASTIEL: Dean—
DEAN: [Holding his arm out to the DOCTOR, he glares defiantly at CASTIEL.] Do it, Doctor.
[The DOCTOR nods and makes a cut as gently as he can, adding DEAN’s blood to the bowl of other ingredients. SAM moves to dress DEAN’s wound as the DOCTOR takes in a deep breath.]
DOCTOR: Cas, you might wanna stand in the middle of those markings there. Everyone else stand back.
[As the DOCTOR starts to draw more Gallifreyan symbols at certain points around the room and chant softly in his native tongue, the others watch anxiously, waiting.]
DONNA: [murmuring softly] Please let this work.
[The DOCTOR’s home-made ritual continues. As the DOCTOR continues to chant softly, CASTIEL slowly starts glowing - barely noticeably at first, but it gradually gets brighter and brighter, until the others have to shield their eyes and turn away from the light. DONNA reaches out to grasp DEAN’s shoulder in some measure of comfort, until finally - finally, as the rhythm of the words falling from the DOCTOR’s mouth changes, the light suddenly shoots outwards, like an explosion without any damage. It’s blinding, and the entire building glows white, but the DOCTOR keeps resolutely chanting even as his eyes screw shut against the glare. Eventually, it fades. Everyone looks up, opening their eyes.]
DOCTOR: [Breathing out heavily] Blimey, I forgot how much heavy spellworking took it out of you… [He seems a little dazed, not quite having got it together just yet.]
DEAN: Where’s Cas?
[Everyone exchanges looks, startled, then glance to where he was standing. CASTIEL’s prone form is lying there, limp, unmoving.]
DEAN: Dammit— [He shrugs off DONNA’s hand and rushes to crouch down next to CASTIEL, swiftly followed by the DOCTOR.] Cas? Damn it, Cas, wake up, you sonnuvabitch— [DEAN looks up at the DOCTOR, who’s crouching over CASTIEL with a stony expression, hands feeling for the pulse points in his wrists and neck before he places two hands on either side of his head.] Is he - did we -
DOCTOR: No. [His voice takes on a tone of wonder, with joy not too far behind.] No, he’s still in there. [He laughs a little, incredulously] We did it. We worked. No souls left in there or anything, he’s just unconscious for a bit, that’s all. Which well, angel or not, anyone would be after detoxing millions of souls. [He laughs again.] Oh, but I’m very good.
DONNA: [While beaming] Yeah, alright you, don’t get a swollen head.
SAM: So where are the souls? I mean you have to have sent them somewhere, right?
DOCTOR: Oh, they’re in that jar over there.
SAM: … the jar. The pottery jar you had us draw symbols over before telling us not to touch it?
DOCTOR: That’s the one. Nice big carry case for all those souls, it’s almost like one of those things you put your pet in when you take it to the vet, really. It’s only a temporary solution, but it’ll do until I can put them somewhere they can’t do any harm.
DEAN: And how are they all fitting in there?
DOCTOR: [Innocently.] Oh, it’s bigger on the inside, of course. [He grins at DEAN’s expression.] Were you really expecting anything else? Come on, we should pack up and get him somewhere more comfortable where he can sleep this off. I’ll leave it to you and your brother to move him, shall I?
[CASTIEL is lying unconscious on a sofa in BOBBY’s house. SAM is nearby, looking up something on his laptop, when the angel stirs, blinking slowly. SAM looks up.]
SAM: Cas, you’re awake.
CASTIEL: Sam? [His expression runs through confusion, realisation, then slight guilt.] … Sam, I owe you an apology. What I did—
SAM: [Holding up a hand] Hey, don’t sweat that right now. I’m not - God, Cas, I’m not saying it’s alright, ‘cause it’s really not, but I’m fine.
CASTIEL: … still, at the very least I should apologise.
SAM: Yeah, well, I kinda think we’ve all got some apologising to do, you know?
DEAN: [From the doorway] Cas awake?
SAM: Just now. Uh… [Packing up his laptop] I’m just gonna go tell the others. Mind taking over for a bit? [With that said, SAM beats a hasty exit.]
DEAN: [While pulling up a chair:] So… that’s it then, huh. Back to normal, no souls or anything?
CASTIEL: It would seem that way.
DEAN: And… how’re you feeling?
CASTIEL: Very, very drained. But otherwise, what I suppose you’d describe as normal.
DEAN: Guess a soul-detox’d do that to you, huh. [An awkward silence ensues.] … so what happens now?
CASTIEL: … I believe that Heaven is, understandably, closed to me right now. I don’t know yet what it is I’ll do.
DEAN: You could stick around for a bit, maybe.
CASTIEL: No.
DEAN: What the hell do you mean, “no”? So that’s it, you finally get that popping open Purgatory and swallowing all those souls was a bad idea, and now it’s all over you don’t want to stick around and try and work things out?
CASTIEL: Why does it always have to be on your terms, Dean?
DEAN: What?
CASTIEL: This… bond we’ve had between us for the past few years. Almost everything about it has been dictated by you. [CASTIEL sighs.] You’re right. One day we will have to… “work things out,” as you say. But I can’t yet. I’m sorry, but I can’t keep on being that angel that you only call when it’s convenient for you.
DEAN: Hey, that’s not—
CASTIEL: Isn’t it?
DEAN: No!
[Before either of them can say anything else, the DOCTOR appears in the doorway, looking in half-curiously, half-apprehensively.]
DOCTOR: Everything alright?
DEAN: … yeah. Fine.
[Everyone stands in front of the TARDIS in the Singer Salvage Yard; the DOCTOR is half-leaning on the TARDIS while DONNA is inside the doorway, smiling at the other four.]
DOCTOR: Well, we’d best be on our way. Whole universe still left to see out there, just waiting for us.
CASTIEL: So you’re moving on again.
DOCTOR: Oh, always. I can’t stand still for all that long, you know that.
CASTIEL: Well, I hope that next time we meet it isn’t too far behind in your own timestream.
DEAN: Can I get that in English, please?
DOCTOR: We keep meeting up in the wrong order. It’s all a bit wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey.
DONNA: Do you meet anyone in the right order?
DOCTOR: Some people! Time travel’s confusing, you should know that by now!
DONNA: It’s a wonder you keep your head screwed on the right way, you. [To CASTIEL] And you, if you can’t go back up to Heaven or anything you should come with us, you know. [She hits the DOCTOR lightly on the arm.] Go on, Spaceman, tell him! I can’t believe you’ve known each other for like, gazillions of years and you’ve never asked him before now!
DOCTOR: Well he wouldn’t have come before now, he had things to do.
DONNA: Yeah, but now though?
DOCTOR: Now that’s up to him. [At DONNA’S unimpressed look:] Blimey, you’re not gonna let me be unless I actually ask, are you? [DONNA’S look grows even more unimpressed.] I’m joking! Actually, Cas, I’d love it if you wanted to come. There’s room in the TARDIS for more than just me and her.
[CASTIEL hesitates, glancing back at the WINCHESTERS and BOBBY for a brief moment before he turns back to the DOCTOR and DONNA.]
CASTIEL: If you are willing to have me, then… yes.
[For a moment, DEAN looks as if he’s about to open his mouth to say something, but thinks better of it at the last minute.]
DONNA: That’s what we’re saying, Angel Boy! [CASTIEL shoots a puzzled look at both DONNA and the DOCTOR; the DOCTOR gives him a look as if to say “just roll with it” as DONNA comes far enough out of the TARDIS to give CASTIEL’s arm a small tug.] Come on!
[The DOCTOR watches the two of them disappear into the TARDIS with a bemused look before turning back to the others.]
DOCTOR: He’ll be alright. He just needs time, that’s all.
DEAN: Hey. [As the DOCTOR looks up, puzzled:] You’ll take care of him, right?
DOCTOR: If I don’t, she will. She’s good at that.
DONNA: [From inside the TARDIS] Oi! Who’s she, the cat’s mother?
DOCTOR: Oo heck, I think that’s my cue to leave. [He smiles at the three men.] Now you three, take care of yourselves, alright? And stay in touch, if you place a call to the time vortex you should get through at least 70% of the time. Well, maybe more like 60. Well, closer to 50.
SAM: We’ll just take our chances and hope for the best. [The DOCTOR grins at him.]
DOCTOR: Right then, I’ll be off. This won’t be the last you see of me, you know.
DEAN: Hopefully we won’t run into any other aliens before then.
[Grinning at that, the DOCTOR gives a small wave before heading into the TARDIS. A few seconds later it begins to dematerialise; END OF EPISODE TWO.]